I AM GAMBIAN!

Dear friend,

As you know, I do have internet access at the place I'm working with (slow, but it works) but they block facebook and other personal sites, like access to my blog -- but not on their wireless system! Unfortunately for me, I decided against lugging my laptop all the way here, thinking it'd probably be good for me anyways to be 'electronically' separated from the world for three months. Didn't think access to my blog was in jeopardy though. One of the medical students here is travelling to Ghana for three weeks and has offered to lend me her laptop while she was away. Much to my excitement, after some glorious quality time on Facebook, I spent a couple hours yesterday on the Wireless, typing away, putting my thoughts for the weekend 'on paper'... only to have it lost to the ether when I tried to post it up.

Gutted.

I've tried salvaging it but unfortunately some things once lost are lost forever.

*Sigh*

So here I go again. :)

It's been almost two weeks since I've arrived and it feels like I have been here a lifetime. I have been loving taking my time 'settling' in and the joys of being on elective -- in other words, no assignments, no assessments, no real expectations except to enjoy myself. I continue to go out 'to the field' (i.e. health clinic out in a town nearby) once or twice a week with the vaccination trial team, which I really look forward to. They are long days -- busy, hectic -- but I get a real insight into the challenges of conducting a clinical trial in a developing country, which was my main aim in coming here. Plus, the team I'm working with are amazing people, so lovely, fun and funny; a real family atmosphere. I've been trying to learn a bit of the local dialect too, Wolof, and they laugh and tease me as I try and fail abysmally. (Languages have never been my forte.)

Yesterday I sat down with my Professor-supervisor to discuss the lab project I'll be doing while I'm here. It's quite exciting, actually, with the hope of developing a blood test that can correctly diagnose M. Tb from M. African (a causative bacterium for TB unique to West Africa) by recognizing various peptides from each. The study is totally do-able within my time here, and a help to their larger project, which was the other personal objective for my elective -- to do something helpful. So it looks like I'll start work on this later this week, while continuing to spend a day or two with the vaccination team. No ward rounds for me, thank you! LoL

The weekend was fun, did a bit more venturing out, but the rain was pretty intense. Despite knowing I'd be coming to The Gambia in the rainy season, packing an umbrella or rain-jacket had never crossed my mind. The majority of the time the heat and humidity builds up over a few hours and then, as if God releases open the dam, it pours down for maybe half an hour, then it's blue skies and heat again. However, this Sunday just passed was the longest it rained for continuously, which was a bit frustrating as it meant I was couped up inside for the duration.

On Saturday a group of us ventured out to one of the fanciest beachside hotels/resorts and it was pure gluttony, being waited on like that. The pool lounge area itself was like a scene from The Great Gatsby, and I half expected Robert Redford to walk out calling for Daisy. Not normally my scene, but it's scary how quickly one can start to get used to it, being waited on like that. You really don't need to be rich (by Western standards) to be live rich here -- no wonder certain places in Africa are popular tourist spots for Europeans! I've found it all a bit... unsettling. Paying what is, for me, so little, but for them (the local workers) so much. This extends not just to waiters etc, but in general -- for the taxis, for goods... most things.

Sunday afternoon one of the guys and I went to the crocodile park. Now, when I say crocodile park, it's not what one would imagine (i.e. theme/animal park on Gold Coast). After a fifteen minute taxi ride we got dropped off in this random 'residential' (i.e. shacks/slums) area and got loose directions on how to get to the park. My friend had been before when he visited The Gambia with his family as a kid, and described it as a pond with crocodiles lying around everywhere, no fences. And he wasn't joking. After a ten minute walk through the maze of shacks with local people sitting around, kids playing, we stumbled upon a dilapidated sign with a picture of a crocodile. We paid our D50 (equivalent to NZD$3) entrance fee and there was literally one medium sized pond with a bunch of crocodiles lounging around in the sun. You could even touch and shake the hand of a couple of them! Apparently they feed them fish every morning so that, to quote the 'pool guide' (the random local guy sitting around), 'No worry, no worry. They don't eat people, like you!'

On our walk back we got approached by heaps of beautiful sweet-looking kids, who would grab hold of our hands and ask for money so that they could buy a football. Which brings me back to that unsettled feeling I had the day before at the hotel. I don't know if it's just me thinking too much, but I find it... difficult. I mean, to give them the money for a football is so easy enough to do (as many 'Too-babs' = white tourists have done before and will continue to do) -- it's not even that much! And by giving them the money I might feel good about myself for a few seconds, I guess. But I'm not sure that it would. I mean, it doesn't really do anything to help the kids in the broader sense; my giving them one NZ dollar as requested isn't doing anything for the much needed Change, in 'solving' the bigger issues at hand. So then I could not give the children the money for the football and instead donate money and/or time to causes or organisations that go about working at these Big Changes, right? And again, I might feel good about myself by doing it... But then, I look around as I walk back from the crocodile park and wonder, is it really that simple? Would that even have much effect?

I don't want to demean or relegate the amazing work that people around the world have done and continue to do as they dedicate their lives to helping the people of Africa in whatever way it may be, whether it's development, health, or education. But, as one person, one woman, one almost-doctor trying to figure out how I can... help... I am overwhelmed. There is no easy solution, no magic answer. It is a quagmire of religion, culture, climate, and landscape. It's tempting to have an imperialistic approach, go in guns-blazing (whatever that may mean) and 're-structure' from the ground up. But history has shown us over and over that is a failed methodology. There is no easy solution, no magic answer.

While I was wondering around Brigham and Women's Hospital there was a dedication for one of their Plastic Surgeons and Nobel laureate, Joseph Murray. At the top of the dedication there was a quote that read: 'Service is the rent we pay to society for living on this earth.'

I remain a pluripotent stem-cell, with a career that lies ahead of me yet to be forged, trying to figure out where my passions lie and my skills best placed, all while trying to listen for God's voice in the process. Maybe I'm not the same idealistic teenager I once was, out to 'Be the change I want to see in the world,' but I hope there is a place where my combination of curiosity and pragmatism can be of service.

Anyways, major digression. :) Random musings for the weekend.

It hasn't been all fun and games though. I've settled in, I think, but still struggling with some things. Sleep -- or lack of uninterrupted sleep -- has started to take its toll on me physically and mentally. Back home I sleep 8hours straight; when I'm out, I'm out. I'm not sure what it is, whether it's the heat or the noise of my ceiling fan or just being in a foreign place, but the sleep hasn't been too good. And it's having it's effect. But I still rejoice because in the very least, I can lie down flat whenever I want -- what an incredible joy and blessing! :) I also daily wage a war with the itchy bites, at least one or two minimum driving me crazy at any given time. Despite the constant glaze of 80% DEET insect repellent all over my skin, I lose the war against these bugs more often than not. And I'm not sure if it's my asian blood or NZ-lack-of-exposure-to-antigens, but I have horrible reactions to them, up to 10, 15cm areas of swelling, redness, indurations. *Sigh* But the hydrocortisone cream helps... a little. LoL.

My tummy's not been all that flash lately either, nothing full-blown but a real dis-ease. I think we all ate something bad one night. I'm trying to be better at taking care of myself (really, mum!), but I fear I haven't been eating all that well. I'm not much of a cook in the best of situations and here, with the heat and humidity and bug-ridden kitchen, there is little if any incentive to cook at all. Which would be fine normally because there are a few restaurants within walking distance, but with the rain it can get a bit tricky. I will try to be better, though, I promise.

So what's on the agenda for this week? Out to the field again today, then getting my head around this lab project. I'm excited though. I might head out to Banjul (the capital city, about 40mins drive away) this weekend -- one of the nurses here who is a local has offered to come with me as my de facto guide and good-price-negotiator.

That's it for now. Probably enough! :) But I'll leave you with a fun fact: did you know that I am Gambian? Apparently my last name is a not uncommon Gambian last name! Isn't that the oddest thing especially since it's such a quintessential asian name? Life, is funny.

Till next time,

With much love,

-A

Thought for the day: What I would give for a mocha frappaccino.